• Cold and New

    NOW THAT I KNOW

  • With all his experiences placed neatly in a picture in his head UB Boy can start afresh. His caring grandmother died though and the house is cold now. In here his little brother smartly takes him back in time to laugh at their past. In Deluciana he seeks warmth, the girl that stands loyal by his side.

  • October 1987  Cold but new UB Boy now trusts the icy path to his past. He finds himself amongst his friends again in a time his family was a safe place to bloom in and explore. That place had a radius that matched UB Child’s comprehension.

    Play Song

  • November 1987  Now, what is better than day dreaming? Trust yourself to have a good night’s sleep and dream and dream and, wow, get lost in a dream. After several fake exits, UB Boy is lucky to find the right door to step in his empty but trusted grandparental home again.

    Play Song

  • December 1987  And again something tries to fool UB Boy in his own dreams. Is it an ancient voice that whispers key messages in his dreaming ears. Should he write those down?

    Play Song

  • January 1988  After these three intriguing dreams where UB Boy gets lost in his past, he moves himself over to the stove. But it doesn’t work. Who can fire up this place? Anyone..?

    Play Song

  • April 1988  And there she is again. Deluciana. Now she can fire up a place! Oh no, UB Boy starts dripping deep hot red. How can he hold her hand as her brother anyway?! As she makes the snow evaporate in an instant!

    Play Song

  • April 1988  And then there comes Joe. Just happily riding his bicycle. With no intentions at all this guy smoothly speeds up to the Universe’s speed limit. Or is this the normal speed and is everything slower the result of unnecessary burden.

    Play Song

  • May 1988  UB Boy would like to mind-meld with his playful friend Deluciana. Of course this is no 23rd century Star Trek episode, so he blows all his life into a mouthorgan and hands it over. Deluciana doesn’t know how the instrument works and overlooks that she can blow AND draw…

    Play Song

  • June 1988  Climbing, still climbing, for years moving up now. That reminds UB Boy of the well known boardinghouse in The Hague. The last elevator was not meant for customers to take. And why is that so?!

    Play Song

  • July 1988  For years now UB Boy tries to find the exit out of this painful situation. But he sees himself moving in circles as the reflections in the glass follow him wherever he goes. Can’t he just break the glass?

    Play Song

  • July 1988  Deluciana is not the way out. Kill your darlings. But UB Boy can’t kill his darling girl. So he comes after himself..! This is when people come to self-mutilation. Oops.

    Play Song

  • Cold and New 1987-1988
    Hide and Seek
    Hide and seek, running away. To a place that’s safe enough. Into a kingdom a square-yard large. Lasting a minute, but of lasting wealth. Yet you won’t overstep the radius of the game. And you’ll stay within the circle, the circle of friends. Hide and seek, they’re running away. Fading out in all directions. And all that’s left is a lot of acres. Acres of time lasting years. Yet you won’t overstep the radius of the game. And you’ll stay within the circle, the circle of friends.

    The sound of iron
    The sound of iron, the smell of food, I let it come all over me. I feel so brown, so autumn-brown. Like a leaf carried by the wind. The bed I lie on, the dreams it keeps, I let it come all over me. I get on my feet again and leave the room. I enter the kitchen, but all I see. All I see is a still-life of pots and pans, a gas-cooker, everything. I wish they'd smiled to me to reassure I'm dreaming. But all I see is ice, a world I don't recognize. I can't rely on the things I hear, the things I smell the house I'm in. I must have missed the main way out, I'm stuck inside a house not mine. A house not mine...

    A wintry day in '69
    From the waterside I sit and watch the world go by. The air is filled with voices, I catch some words here and there. Men with tight-lipped faces skating off, off and on. They tear the sound to pieces, causing the distortion field. From the waterside I find myself home suddenly. Memories out of nothing, in pieces now they come again. I stand up still a bit dizzy, gazing at the world outside. Winter’s just begun, causing this distortion field. From the window-pane, now I turn around and face a quite familiar room, deserted long ago. On the ground some toys, considered lost for years. And predestined as it seems a magazine dated ’69. Something tries to fool me, even following me in my dreams. Or it’s something very childlike, the way it tries to lure me. In fact I’d like to know then, what it is, it wants to show. Fancy it is Me, revealing what I kept for years.

    So cold here

    ...So cold here. I wonder why it always ends up again playing that fire, playing that fire myself. Again?! ...Home, so this is home. Jesus why I'm alone then. Don't interfere, I was just talking, I was just talking to myself. Sing a song, entertain me. Lullaby, drug me. One cup-o’-coffee, milk & sugar please ...sugarpie.Please, have a seat & keep me company ...please do! Fly with me to the sun. Melt with me forever. One final taste of the pink solution. Please, take a nip & I’ll talk you up the sky. Let-us-dis-solve!

    The colour I bleed
    Girl I love you, can you feel it: the warmth I radiate. I'm losing liquid, dripping deep red. Ain't it a beautiful colour I bleed. April is playing. Made its choice to be white. Shaped us perfect a scenery to frolic around. I feel burning all over, feel the drive in my veins. It’s a nice balanced power and I, I’m in charge. Girl I love you, can you feel it: the warmth I radiate. I'm losing liquid, dripping deep red. Ain't it a beautiful colour I bleed. We've been playing all day. I’ve been your brother so far. Let us lay down a moment and quit a while. Let me open your blouse. Let me bite in your chest. See the blood you were hiding, the colour I lost. Girl I love you, can you feel it: the warmth I radiate. I'm losing liquid, dripping deep red. Ain't it a beautiful colour I bleed.

    Into the next gear (Joe)
    Joe, riding his bike (bicycle), waving at the countryside, saying hello to the sun, kissing, kissing the air. And he 's so proud of his brand new bike, into the next gear! Farms and trees he now leaves far behind, overtaking shadows of birds. Speeding at the speed of a motorcar, he can even kiss their rearlights...( ksss ). And he 's so proud of his brand new bike, into the next gear! Trains going East, leaving people at stations watching by. Planes, his bike taking off. above or in the clouds. Space. colours. Lyrics not finished yet, will follow later…

    The Mouthorgan-kiss
    I'm watching the face in the poster. James Dean smiling at me. Never will I be like you, I'm just a boy. My hand slips over her leg, she's just a girl. My mouthorgan shines, she watches me and listens. It's for her I play, but I play a tune I like. I'm blowing all the life, all the life I've got in me. And drawing all the shit, all the shit from yesterday. I hand it over, she blows a chord or two. It slides through her lips from left to right. She watches a bit silly at the tiny instrument. Then gives it back to me, giving back the life I gave.

    The escalator song
    Walking... no we're running up the escalator. Our jackets hanging loose over the shoulders. We don't know where we're going, but we started somewhere. Attracted by the light and we're certain it must be up there. Climbing, still climbing, zigzagging through the crowd. They don't know, where they're going on this stairway to the light. We know we are running, cause we started it once. Enchanted by the light that is calling from behind that iron door. We have discovered the boardinghouse-throne. See all those people, the ever-seeking crowd. We have discovered the boardinghouse-brains. See us two boys, the masters of the escalator-end.

    Dancing in the ballroom
    I’m always drawing circles. Why do I always turn around, moving up and down, closing in a strange way. In this ballroom made of glass I always dance these figures. The only ones to partner me are the reflections in the glass. Why can I not find a home, just to find myself some rest. And live like everyone in the rhythm of the... ...day takes so long. It looks to me a whole life. Yet it feels like wasted time, like wasting a whole life. Now I’m staring at the glass, know that I can break it. Imagining the crashing sound of a ballroom at its end.

    She is total...
    I've got a girl and she's my doll. I comb her hair and dreams we share. I’ve got a friend, he is my toy. I drive him fast till I’m run out of joy. She is total. She is the girl I always adored: I dressed her, I made her. He is the boy that always bored: never was there, never will be. She is total yeah! Deep at night, when tints are blue, she knows I do see through her eyes. She is mine! And in the light there stands that boy. Pouting silly, who is he anyway? She is total! Girl, go and get him. Squeeze him in your arms. I said, squeeze him on your lips. In your body, your fatal embrace. Right! That’s my girl! I said that’s my girl!! She is mine!! She is mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!